further study..

ramai pulak yg btanya pe mimpi i nak further study.. tak kira in facebook, YM n SMS.. sume org tanya.. so, for me, i consider it as my frenz care so much bout me! haha! thanks a lot to all of them!

utk tidak mengulangi berulang kali citer2 i mengenai tajuk di atas, i kira lebih baik sdikit sebanyak i citer dlm entry nih (kdg i rasa better i rekod suara i utk jawab soalan all my caring frenz. hehe!).. reasons y i choose to further study:

1. i'm frustrated with the education system - pelajar boleh dibuang skolah ttapi jika mereka merayu, tak boleh tolak rayuan tu.. kena amik balik! cam ludah jilat balik je! huh!
2. i always felt depressed teaching in my recent school - pentadbiran tak bg tekanan, tp budak2 tlalu tak ketahuan!
3. i dah cuba mcm2 cara to approach probematic students n mgunakan pihak ketiga spt PK HEM, kaunselor, etc.. tp students ni terlalu tegar - ati dah gelap gelemat, amat sukar dibentuk!
4. i slalu marah2 waktu pagi sbb stiap hari i ada klas pada waktu pertama - akan bkurang rezeki i duk marah2 budak tiap2 pagi ari...
5. i takut dek kerana terlalu depress a.k.a. stress, sukar utk i handle pkara2 lain.. (kdg2 pkara yg tjadi kat tempat keja tbawa2 ke rumah - besala.. dah nama perempuannn..)
6. walaupun BALA sedang mnimpa kat skolai i (kes histeria), tp mereka anggap perkara itu sbg hiburan n keseronokan.. tidak blaja dari kesilapan.. n tidak pernah ada inisiatif belajar baca/hafal ayat qursi utk pendinding diri! suh mengucap pun duk konfius dgn istighfar! aiseh! sape nak jwb tuh?

actually, furthering my study is just an option.. i am still considering other things rite now.. i taktau samada my decision to further study is the rite thing to do for myself and people around me.. urgh! pikir psl ni pun dah mbebankan hotak i.. i'm still gathering information n motivation to go on with my life.. too many things happen on me lately.. one of it is i kene blackmail dgn budak form 3! i ingat nak but police report.. huh! biaq dia ada akai sket!